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Why I am Voting No! by Paul Corner

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Paul Corner
Rev. Paul Corner Why I am voting NO!

(Below is a statement that Rev. Paul Corner made at the Covenant Annual Meeting which just concluded in Kansas City. Coming Out Covenant applauds Paul’s stand. We believe that though his vote may be 1, that he speaks for hundreds and even thousands of Covenant members, friends and former members. God bless you Paul for your courage! Paul published this online and we do so here at COC with his permission. If Paul’s words inspire you please share this with others. If you are interested in learning more please see a list of books at the end of the post which could be of help.)

This has been a momentous couple of days with the Supreme Court ruling that marriage equality is constitutional. For me personally, there are mixed emotions. I’m overjoyed for what this ruling means for family members and dear friends. Love truly wins. My heart is also heavy as I consider the fact that there is more work to be done in the church. In the past year, two of my dearest friends and their churches are no longer part of the same denomination as me because they and their churches embraced the full inclusion of LGBT people in all levels of membership and leadership in their church. This led to the severing of their relationships with our denominational home. The injustice of it is simple, but the political and theological nuance is not. In our tradition, we seek to be non-creedal meaning we seek to maintain relationship with one another despite disagreement on matters not central to the Christian faith. In these instances, we failed to live with that Spirit. So, today at our denominational annual meeting, I will be voting ‘no’ on our denomination’s budget as a symbolic act of lament over loss, in solidarity with those who suffer, and with the hope that God can redeem us and continue to bind us together as ‘companions of ALL who fear thee.’ Below is the statement I made.

I stand today to voice my opposition to the budget that has been presented. However, it is not because of what is in it. I am proud of the rich heritage of our church, and the good work we continue to do in Christ’s name. I’m honored by our commitment to being students of the Word of God as well as, in the Spirit of freedom in Christ, the relational emphasis to how we do theology together. I’m humbled by our strong commitment to the whole mission of the church, and I am proud of a tradition that works hard on important moral questions like racial diversity, gender equality, immigration, and holistic development. I am glad to continue to support these things and more that are represented in this budget, and I commend those who have put in the work to steward well the resources God has entrusted to us.

Today, my opposition is not because of what is in it, but rather because of what is excluded from it. I’m speaking specifically about the funding for a new church plant, Christ Church: Portland, who is no longer supported by this denominational family. Pastor Adam Phillips of Christ Church had the funding for his church pulled because he intended to plant a congregation that fully welcomed lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people into its membership and leadership. Similarly, I am also speaking about St. Johns Covenant Church in Portland and their Pastor Andy Goebel, a three year old church plant who was told they wouldn’t likely be approved as a member congregation in the Pacific Northwest Conference and the ECC because of their commitment to full inclusion at all levels of participation, membership, and leadership. I’m troubled by these actions for several reasons.

First, I am troubled by these as acts of injustice. If budgets are theological documents, I cannot stand behind a budget that has made the choice to exclude people and churches from our worshipping community. I believe the Gospel calls on us to err on the side of grace and mercy. I do not understand why congregations cannot be planted in the Covenant family with the same spirit that many others of our churches exist — namely, a commitment to welcome all without theological consensus on a matter that is not central to our faith. Indeed, this spirit of welcome is one that has been embraced by many Covenant churches. By laying aside these two congregations, it causes congregations like my own, who embrace this spirit, to question how we are to continue supporting this denomination of which we have been a part for over 125 years.

Second, I’m opposed to this action because it cheapens the call for all of us who serve as credentialed ministers of the Gospel in the Covenant. One of the great strengths of our ministerium is that we are dedicated students of the Word. Within that dedication, we make room for conversation, debate, and relationship trusting in the Spirit to hold us together in the midst of it. Hence our rules which allow for dissent but have expectations for pastoral practice. I believe that healthy debate and even disagreement amongst colleagues, in the end, serves to make us all stronger. However, when we silence one part of the conversation as happened in these cases, we cheapen our call to the point that the stoles gifted to us by the people in our ordination — the symbol of our commitment to Christ and the Church — are cheapened to something not unlike a sweat rag around the neck of laborers in an ecclesial sweatshop.

Finally, I am opposed to this budget action because it does not fit within our historical ethos of companions of ALL who fear thee. We have been a church that is able to hold in tension non-creedal theological convictions for the sake of unity. We have been a church that has erred on the side of grace and mercy. And, we have been a church that allows space for congregations to consider how ministry is shaped and practiced in their context. We have allowed these values to shape how we have lived together as a beautifully diverse body with diverse convictions and a spirit of grace around important matters like baptism, women in ministry, divorce, and more. We have done this with the conviction that despite what may divide us, God calls us together and makes us strong in one common mission. I believe this Spirit can prevail again as we consider the LGBT people in our churches and our communities. Pastor Adam and Pastor Andy are not alone amongst our clergy in their convictions on LGBT inclusion and affirmation, and they broke none of the rules of the ordered ministry. Not only that, their congregations did not embrace a posture towards LGBT inclusion that is any different than many other congregations in our Covenant who are seeking faithfully to do ministry in their communities. Actions like these taken against Christ Church and St. John’s cheapen our whole movement and make us companions of only some who fear thee — a kind of disembodied fundamentalism that does not embrace the Spirit of who we have been or the Spirit of relationship in, by, and with Christ that is at the heart of who we are.

So, today I will cast a no vote on this budget, again, not because of what it does contain, but because of what it does not contain. It is a vote cast lamenting the loss of congregations, colleagues, friends, and parishioners who no longer feel safe in our Covenant. It is a vote cast in solidarity with the many LGBT Covenanters who wonder if their church will make room for them at the table. Yet, it is a hopeful vote that trusts in the Spirit of God to bind us together and grant strength to our leaders to lead with boldness, creativity, and grace trusting that though the road is difficult, God is at work in our church and will continue to lead us forward as friends in mission.

(Paul had an earlier post on COC which you can read here.)

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Tony Campolo Advocates for Full Acceptance of Christian Gay Couples into the Church

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tony campoloTony Campolo, well known evangelical writer and speaker released a statement on June 8, 2015 calling for “the full acceptance of Christian gay couples into the Church.” Campolo, states that his change of heart came through “countless hours of prayer, study, conversation and emotional turmoil to bring me to the place where I am finally ready to call for the full acceptance of Christian gay couples into the Church.”

He summarizes, ” As a social scientist, I have concluded that sexual orientation is almost never a choice and I have seen how damaging it can be to try to “cure” someone from being gay. As a Christian, my responsibility is not to condemn or reject gay people, but rather to love and embrace them, and to endeavor to draw them into the fellowship of the Church.”

The full statement can be read on Campolo’s  blog.

Coming Out Covenant applauds Dr. Campolo for his courage and forthrightness and invites other like minded Church Leaders to let it be known when God works in their minds and hearts in similar fashion. While it is the stated purpose of this blog to provide a safe place for LGBT Covenanters and others to tell their stories of “coming out” it is also important for straight Christians to tell their stories of how God has changed their minds and hearts on this issue.

If you would like to read stories of how God worked in people’s hearts and minds you might want to consider reading;

David Gushee’s Book Changing Our Mind

Does Jesus Really Love Me?:A Gay Christian’s Pilgrimage in Search of God by Jeff Chu

God and the Gay Christian by Matthew Vines.

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The Love Extended Me

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(COC’scross_tattoo_version_one_by_sythe01-d4l9rt5 foremost purpose is to provide a place for Covenanters to tell their story of “Coming Out.” We welcome submissions. We thank the author, who chooses to remain anonymous,  for sharing their story.)

I recently read that for its first two hundred years Shakespeare’s King Lear floundered.  From 1642 until 1660 the Puritan revolution had closed theatres across England.  Nahum Tate, the son of a Puritan clergyman, saw his role in the burgeoning British empire as his ability to improve its literature.  In 1681 he introduced a sanitized version of Lear, which dominated the stage for 150 years.  What was the reason for his re-write?  Lear’s actions were inexplicable to the minds of Puritans who detected no moral uplift as a result of the trials that he endured.  Tate resolved the problems by: changing the character’s motivations, having the actors who exhibited lesser moral fiber die in the end, and re-scripting Lear as a victim of villains.  The last scene resolves the play in merriment with actors, Enjoy[ing] the present Hour, nor fear[ing] the Last.  The play ends with all of the characters jigging off the stage to Pharrell William’s lyrical tune, Happy.

~~~~~

For the past twenty-five years I’ve been a close friend with the most gifted organist to ever play in a church that I served.  Now in his seventies, he is still invited each year to perform at festivals that feature some of the oldest organs in the USA.  And there was another, a vocalist with an operatic baritone voice, with whom I have sadly lost touch.  A Native American, he specialized in 19th century hymns.  Standing at the front of the church, with long black hair sitting on his shoulders, his singing was wonderfully moving.  Each of these men made profound impacts on the congregations I served through their participation in worship.  Both loved Christ; both knew themselves loved by Christ.  Each of them were, and are, homosexual.  And there were others: Christian educators, doctoral students, parishioners, vowed religious brothers and sisters, priests, Protestant pastors, and even Covenant clergy.

~~~~~

Some of the first words in the Gospel of John are, In the beginning was the logos.  Greeks understood the word logos as indicative of a language used to develop linearly logical arguments that could then be debated.  And John uses it to indicate that his writing too will be logical, but in a different way.  John’s usage of the word logos challenges all of us to give up our ordered notions of God and to exchange it for the logic with which God makes sense of the world, which is actually pathos…the manner in which we are related to one another.  In other words, God’s logic enters our lives at a transformative gut-level…and the single greatest indicator of whether we have acquired God’s logic, is whether we truly love or not.  King Lear stands in relation to the rest of Shakespeare’s writings as the Gospel of John, or the drama of Job, stands in relation to the rest of Scripture; these are remonstrations and chastenings.

~~~~~

It has been nearly 20 years since the Evangelical Covenant Church took its non-binding vote on human sexuality in 1996.  When that happened I began to caution homosexual Covenant friends, colleagues, and parishioners to start looking for a new spiritual home.  It was difficult for me to do and difficult for many to hear.  And I myself began a measured retreat from Covenant ministry a few years later until I eventually, and quietly simply stepped out of Covenant ministry altogether.  I went through a deep and horrible grieving process throughout this time.  I grieved because the love that I extended to all people equally and indiscriminately as a minister of Christ’s was silenced and seen as traitorous by the spiritual family who had convinced me when I was growing up that God is love.

I will always greatly value my Covenant roots.  I still promote everywhere and with everyone the Covenant’s motto, that I am a companion of all who fear Thee.  I wish my Covenant friends well in being this when it comes to fully understanding, and truly loving all people, including those in the LGBT community without any strings attached.  It’s certainly not an issue for my children who are now adults and who can’t quite wrap their minds around why it is so difficult for the church in which they were raised to do this?  They, too, know that they are no longer welcome in the Covenant and attend worship elsewhere.  I recently had a friend comment to me that it was a lot easier for them to love LGBT’s than to love the Christians who don’t love LGBT’s.  I wryly told them that I thought that that was a pretty profound statement and that if they chewed on that long enough they ran the risk of actually living their way into God’s reign!  It certain is much easier to fully accept LGBT’s than many Christians seem to be making it.

Peace…

 

Allies, Family, LGBT, Uncategorized

“Surviving the Care of the Church” : Jack Woodin

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woodinfamI grew up in the Catholic Church, and discovered the Evangelical Covenant Church 29 years ago when I met a wonderful young woman who would eventually become my wife.  Amazed by the Christian love and fellowship that I had not had in my life of faith, I embraced the ECC whole-heartedly.  I joined the church and in 1986, I was married at Bethany Covenant Church in New Britain, CT.  I had dreamed of this ideal life for all of my growing up years, and the icing on the cake was that it came with the incredible bonus of a new journey of faith.  In that church which eventually relocated to Berlin, CT, I learned about what it meant to follow Jesus.  A whole world of faith and family was opened up to me! Over the years of our marriage, through many struggles, the constant that kept us afloat was that abiding love of God and the gift of a loving, caring church family that walked with us down every road. I have worshipped, laughed and cried in that place and served in numerous leadership roles including a few years as church chairman. I have been heavily involved in the music programs and the eventual evolution of contemporary worship for the church.  As our church motto states, for me Bethany Covenant Church was truly a place where “people come to life!”

After 20 years of marriage, I found myself growing increasingly unhappy.  I had everything I had wanted, and still something was wrong.  My joy was leaving and I could not get it back.  I sought counseling and spent a lot of time praying and working through childhood issues and emotional challenges but not really getting to the root of my pain. I took a break from that counseling and in my alone time and prayer time I began to realize what was so terribly wrong.  I returned to counseling and in that first meeting with a new therapist I sat down and said, “this is what I’m here for”; “I have been married for 24 years and have a great life and family but I am terribly unhappy because I have realized that I am gay!” Just saying those words aloud was both one of the most frightening moments of my life and one of the most liberating ones.  This was not in my plan for my life and yet everything within me told me that this was the missing puzzle piece. That summer while vacationing at Pilgrim Pines in New Hampshire, a Covenant Camp and Retreat Center, our pastors Adam Phillips and Aaron Johnson talked about rewriting your story through the prism of your faith; looking at your past life, mistakes, patterns and trials and prayerfully setting out on a new path.   “The rewrite happens when you realize that the program for the first act of your life does not work for the second half”, they said, and I realized that this was true of my story!  I could not keep silently fighting the battle. My story was flawed.  I spent 2 years in that therapist chair exploring this new reality.  I worked through the question “how in the world can I change my life and somehow not lose all that I relied on?”  I struggled to know “ what the “right” thing to do was for both  me and my family? “ Not only did I fear the loss of my family, I feared that I would have to give up my church and that worst of all, that Jesus would not love this new me.

With the help of a great Christian therapist, I knew what I needed to do to make sense of my life.  I made a plan to have the “coming out” conversation with my wife. In January of 2013, we sat down and I dropped the bomb. There was no explosion!  She listened intently, quietly cried and then told me that she really knew or suspected for some time and told me it was okay and gave me the most gentle and affirming hug.  What a gift.  The conversation I had dreaded for so long was behind me and I could share with the person with whom I discussed and confided everything for so long the one thing I had kept  secret from her.  Together we talked and solicited help from our counselors to prepare for the eventual separation, and to make a plan for how and when we would include our kids then 17 and 12 in the story.  In June of 2013, we told them the reality about Dad and that ultimately we would divorce.  My kids have been a marvel.  They love and support me and are ready to take on anybody who does not.  They know that the same man who loved and cared for them and taught them about the love of Jesus is still with them. It is just that life at home will look different.

I had spent many years singing with the praise team at Bethany and I continued in that role.   My wife and I kept our reality very close to the vest and inside our family for many months. At the end of the summer of 2013, I decided that out of love and respect it was time to let the church know what was happening in our home.  After all, I had shared with the people I loved the most, my wife and my kids and the world had not stopped turning, rather I received love and support.  I felt empowered to have the same conversation with my pastor and include my other love, the church, in the loop.  My conversation with the senior pastor was very kind and I was greatly relieved.  At that point, suddenly the dam began to crack and the mood changed.  The pastor met with church officers to discuss our situation, and they made the decision that I could no longer lead worship and sing with the praise team.  Church leadership asked me to step out of my role in the music ministry. The message was that this “break” was only about the dissolution of our marriage and a breach of our marriage vows not about the fact that I was gay.  At the same time leaders and church staff learned of our situation, we found that questions about our marriage and our problems were a topic of discussion both inside and outside the walls of the church. Because of this, I chose to tell my story and sent messages to people within the church that I valued and told them what was happening with us. This proved to be very painful for our family. A private matter that we had been handling with great care and gentleness was now under a spotlight.  Forced to explain my absence from the worship team, we had to endure the watchful eyes of many in the congregation. I received hateful communications from a member whom I hardly knew.  Dear friends who once lovingly engaged with me now completely turned away and ceased all communication.  A letter stating the “decision” of the church was hand-delivered to us.  It felt like our innermost concerns were now “posted” at the church for all to see. The letter referred to a period of reflection and “care” from the church, but it felt like punishment and rejection. I had heard that term “under care” used before when clergy members were involved in personal struggles, but the difference was that I am not a pastor and not even on church staff.  My only public role was singing worship songs on Sunday mornings. How could this church, where I had learned about Christian love, and  faithfully following the teachings of Jesus, now push me away? I was blindsided.

Where we are now is complicated.  I have moved out of the home and we are finalizing the legal separation that is inevitable for our family.  We are a family forever and our love and care for each other has not diminished. Initially in our pain and surprise during this period of “care”, we avoided being present at the church, but we realized that our kids loved it and wanted to be there. We wanted to support them as well as teach them about how you face adversity particularly within a family and what we do when the going gets tough.  “No running away.”  We also knew that the majority of our social connections and extended “family” were there. Being absent from there was a tremendous loss for us all.  Last fall, I attended a men’s retreat at Pilgrim Pines lead by Pastor Judy Peterson from North Park Seminary.  Judy and her preaching has had a tremendous impact in my life.  My thought going into that weekend was that I needed to find some private time with Judy to ask “what do you do when you know that Jesus loves you and the church doesn’t?” I never asked the question because in her message she gave me the answer.  The message was that Jesus loves me and wants care for me in a gentle and loving way.  I do not always have to be strong and just as Jesus told the disciples in the boat when they were afraid of sinking “do not be afraid.”  Judy said Jesus is telling us, “don’t focus on the storm, don’t look at the wind; don’t look at the waves… look at me and you won’t be afraid.  I wept as Judy prayed and I knew we were going to be okay.  This message was so simple and yet so profound.  Jesus is my strength; the church and all the politics and awkwardness are the storm and I can endure if I keep my eyes on Him.

We continue to attend and wait for God to show us if this remains our home.  So many dear friends in the congregation have stood with us and loved us, and for them I am eternally grateful.  Will I ever return to full “citizenship”?  The answer is unclear. In January 2014, I again met with the pastor and church chair.  I posed the question, “when my divorce is behind me, when and how will I be fully welcomed back?”  The reality is that I am a gay man.  “When the day comes that God blesses me with a new partner, will it be okay for me to worship with that man in my church?” The State of Connecticut says I can be married to that man if I choose, but the church does not.  “Would I be asked to take another break?” The response was that this is something that the church will need to work through before I will have my answer.

I know in the depths of my heart and soul that when God created me he did not make a mistake – I just did not understand or see the beauty in his creation for a very long time.  In my early years, I neither saw nor wanted to see it, and then later when I did see it, I fought so hard to live the life to which I thought I had been called.  Doing so nearly destroyed me.  I am a child of God and a follower of Jesus.  I am a sinner saved by grace that can now live life to its fullest and trust that God is pleased with me. The Covenant church has been my teacher, my pastor and my friend for 29 years, so I would like to stay and help the denomination evolve in their position on homosexuality, but I also know that I need to be somewhere that I can be my true self.  I believe in the value of the Covenant Church, and my prayer is that time and good communication will shed a positive light on the subject and lead to change.  I believe the people in leadership in my church are truly people who desire to do what is right and do not harbor ill feelings toward me but they are people with their own preconceived notions, fears and baggage.  The challenge will be for leadership within the local church and the denomination to discern when it is time to lead the people through this difficult discussion and to take a stand from a place of love. Then, the “care of the church” will look much more like love and acceptance rather than punishment and judgment. I would like to think I would be there when it happens but time will tell.  At the moment I am standing tall under the “care” of the church and resting in the knowledge that I am a child of God… fully loved and fully accepted.  This church struggle is only the storm, the wind and the waves, because when I lift up my head, I see Jesus and I am not afraid!

Allies, LGBT, Uncategorized

Calling All Parents…..

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“Mom, I have something to tell you…I’m gay”.  “Dad…I think that I am in the wrong body, I think that I am really a boy”.  

(Coming Out Covenant is pleased welcome guest poster Laura Statesir from the Marin Foundation and to invite your participation in developing resources for families of LGBTQ children.)

One of the most difficult and life changing statements a parent can hear is that of their child coming out to them.  When your daughter tells you she’s bisexual or your three year old son insists that God made a mistake and he is really a girl, what do you do?  Like a bomb being dropped, this revelation has the potential to tear families apart.  Parents often feel scared, angry, confused, anxious, hopeless, and very alone.  Their hopes and dreams for their children are shaken and replaced with fears of discrimination, AIDS, and stigma.  For parents of the Christian faith, the questions may be even more complicated.  What does the Bible say?  How will my church react?  Will my child go to hell?  What does this mean for my faith?

The Need:

Over the years the Marin Foundation has received numerous requests for help, guidance, and advice from the parents and families of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer/questioning (LGBTQ) children.  Most of these parents identify as Christian and are struggling to reconcile their faith and the sexuality or gender identity of their child.  Although many resources exist for the parents and families of LGBTQ children, few of these resources offer a framework for exploring this issue from a loving Christ-like perspective.  Therefore, the Marin Foundation is launching a Parent Resource Initiative to identify the needs of Christian parents of LGBTQ children and then develop new resources to help them keep their faith AND love their child at the same time.

The Marin Foundation: 

The purpose of the Marin Foundation is to help build bridges between the LGBTQ community and the church in a non-threatening, research and biblically oriented fashion.  More information can be found on our websites, www.themarinfoundation.org and www.loveisanorientation.com

WE NEED YOUR HELP!!!  

Our goal is to interview 200 Christian parents of LGBTQ children as well as others involved in supporting families (therapists, support group leaders, etc.).  We want to hear your story! 

We are looking for a representative sample of parents from all over the United States, of all ages, ethnic backgrounds and ranges of Christian beliefs.  Whether your child came out to you two days ago or twenty years ago, we would love to hear about your experience. 

Participation consists of a written survey and an interview.  The interviews generally take 1 to 2 hours and can be done in person (within the Chicago area), over the phone, or through Skype at your convenience.  The survey is online and takes about thirty minutes to complete.  All information is kept confidential.

A Safe Space

We would like to provide a safe space for you to share your story without fear of condemnation or judgment.  Regardless of your religious, cultural, political, or other views on this subject, we want to know what this experience has been like for you.

To Participate: 

Please contact Laura Statesir at the Marin Foundation for more information.   You can email her at Laura@themarinfoundation.org or call 773-572-5983.

Allies, Clergy, Family, Uncategorized

Rev. Alden Johnson: “A Grandfather Speaks”

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“Grandpa, can I hold your hand?” asks my four-year old granddaughter as we walk on the sidewalk of South Street in Jamaica Plain, Massachusetts. “Of course!” is my enthusiastic response. Soon her twin sister catches up to us and wants to hold my hand as well. Not much can make a grandparent happier that holding hands with his twin granddaughters. Of course, they know that at a street crossing, they must hold the hand of an adult. They’ve been taught that by their mothers.

“Their mothers” is not a typo. My granddaughters have two mothers. One is, of course, our daughter. They live in a neighborhood where a two-mom family doesn’t raise eyebrows. Their preschool has two-mom families, two-dad families, single-parent families, mom-and dad families. It’s just the way things are. The church that our daughter and her spouse attend has the same family diversity. The lead pastor is openly gay and lives with his same-gender partner. It is not an issue! A walk in the park reveals ethnic diversity and different family constellations. Could this be a fulfillment of the prayer we repeat Sunday after Sunday, “Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven?” I’m confident the answer is a resounding, “Yes!”

Yes, the word “spouse” was not a mistake either. Our daughter and her partner were united in marriage by a Presbyterian clergywoman who later made national news when she was reprimanded for performing another same-gender wedding. (Charges against her were recently dismissed.) It was a lovely ceremony with about 100 family members and friends gathered to celebrate the occasion. Incidentally there were eight ordained Covenant clergy at that wedding as well as several members from the congregation that I previously served.  Everyone from our family was in attendance and wonderfully supportive of the newly married couple. It was a great party!  It is legal in Massachusetts for same-gender couples to be married. Shouldn’t it be that way everywhere?

Well, we mean to do our part!  This past June my wife and I co-hosted a house party sponsored by Mainers United for Marriage. This is a coalition of groups banded together to support the ballot initiative this November to allow same-gender marriage in the State of Maine, which was defeated three years ago. We and many others hope and are working for its success this time.  We believe that folks are increasingly aware that being gay or lesbian is innate and not a choice and that no one should be denied a lifelong commitment through marriage.

The picture may be becoming clearer–not only am I a grandfather and a father but also an ordained Covenant pastor, a graduate of North Park Seminary (Class of 1964), and have served Covenant churches for almost 30 years. Furthermore, I am passionately committed to the notion that people, no matter what their God-given sexual identity, have the right to formalize Their love for another person through marriage. As for many, this stance and these convictions didn’t just happen. There are stories, events along the way, that helped to mold what I stand for now.

The religious stance in my childhood home was conservative and evangelical. We didn’t talk about sex and most certainly didn’t discuss alternative sexual identities. I have faint recollections of high school locker room comments about someone being “gay,” but I’m not sure I was aware of what that meant. Reflecting on my two years at North Park College(1956 – 58), I don’t recall thinking of classmates being lesbian or gay. However as time went on and my awareness progressed, I began to hear that some were. Later, with further thought and exposure, my rational response to the “gay issue” was one of openness and acceptance, although my visceral reaction to same-sex couples showing affection was discomfort.

Another “marker event” occurred in March, 1987. I had served the Covenant Congregational Church of Waltham, Massachusetts for 13 years. Two other churches, both American Baptist, and our church sponsored a Lenten Study Series entitled, “A Christian’s Look at Social Issues.”  I was the primary organizer. One session topic was “Alternative Life Styles—Homosexuality.”  Twenty five years later that doesn’t sound very dramatic, but if any readers can place themselves in that moment in time in a Covenant church along with two Baptist churches bringing in a resource person (an ordained Southern Baptist and PhD candidate at Boston University) to address this topic and lead a discussion, you realize that although it probably wasn’t quite “cutting edge,” it wasn’t far behind.

My exposure and comfort level were greatly enhanced in the early 1990’s as my wife worked in the graphic arts department of a nationally known magazine. Several co-workers were openly gay. Often at social gatherings with these folks we would be in the distinct minority as a straight couple.

Many of you have read Lynda McGraw’s poignant piece “My Beloved Brother” on Coming Out Covenant. I presided at her brother’s memorial service in the Covenant Congregational Church of Waltham in 1996. Mark had been in a confirmation class that I taught. His parents were close friends, so I had been aware of Mark being gay through many conversations with them. I knew that he had become ill and suffered beside them. I remember vividly gathering with Mark’s family and his partner, James, to plan the service. I wanted to be fully supportive. I hope that I was. It was a beautiful moment in the sanctuary of the Waltham church.

Because I’m a Covenant pastor, some will wonder how I can assume this open, affirming stance on LGBT issues. How can I disregard Scripture passages that seem to condemn homosexual behavior? My answer is neither profound nor unique. I simply ask, “How can we expect the biblical authors to have a positive approach to homosexuality without the evidence and insight we have now?” Why can we not label these verses as culturally tainted as are passages presuming that the earth is flat, slavery is acceptable, women must not speak in church  (certainly not with an uncovered head), divorced people must not be pastors, etc., etc.?  Peter Gomes’s The Good Book brought clarity to my thinking about these Biblical injunctions. He calls typical church views of homosexuality “the last prejudice.” I’m not sure I agree it’s the “last prejudice,” but it’s surely a prejudice the church should fight to eradicate. I’m absolutely convinced that, facing a choice of Scriptural interpretation, love of neighbor trumps everything.

Obviously I am very troubled by the current stance of our denomination, but I am confident that as our society progresses in understanding and affirmation, so the Covenant church will eventually grow. Other denominations have taken the lead and yes, have paid a price, but I suspect God cares more for people and principle than for impressive statistics!

In my 74 years, I’ve shed notions here and there and acquired new understandings along the way. I thank God and the people who have aided my growth. I intend to work and support to the best of my ability in my remaining years those principles that have become part and parcel of my being.  Of course, there will always be time to enjoy my beautiful granddaughters, watch them grow and become gracious women, and be thankful for their mothers who have given them life and, like all mothers, want all that is good for their children. That makes me as happy as my grandaughters wishing to hold my hand does now!

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VIDEO: Former Evangelical Covenant-er Rep. Drew Hansen Speaks in favor of the State of Washington’s Bill to legalize same sex marriage!

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This week Washington State moved one step closer to becoming the seventh state to legalize same-sex marriage when the State House voted, 55 to 43, in favor of bill ESSB 6239. The bill had already been approved by the state senate and now awaits Gov. Christine Gregoire’ signature and the inevitable challenges that will follow.

Of course this bill produced much debate which included testimony of Christian Representatives who explained that because of their religious convictions they opposed passage of this legislation, that is until Rep. Drew Hansen stood up to speak. Rep. Hansen quietly and eloquently describes why as a Christian he was voting in favor of the bill.  He mentions that he is a “PK” (preacher’s kid), and that his mother, a retired minister in the Evangelical Covenant church, would in the near future be giving the morning prayer in the state legislature.

Turns out that Rep. Hansen grew up in the Mercer Island Covenant Church although presently he and his family are now actively involved in a Lutheran Congregation. He himself is part of weekly bible study and prayer gathering at the state capital.

Our hats are off to Rep. Hansen, for making a difference for the gay and lesbian community and for helping the general public understand that not all Christians think the same way on this issue. His quiet and sincere way of speaking can not help but impress upon you that sincere and devout Christians (and Evangelical Covenanters) can hold differing understandings of what the Bible has to say about homosexuality. You will want to watch this video, and to “like it” and “share it.”  Our only sadness is  that while Rep. Hansen is a true “Covenanter” in the spirit of being a “Companion of all who fear thee” he is  a “former Covenanter” in practice. Rep. Hansen, thank you for your example of piety, love, and courage! May more people follow your example.

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Nathan Albert: “Belong, Believe, Become”

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Nathan Albert, The Marin Foundation

During my years working as a professional singer and actor I was often quiet about my faith, especially around my countless gay or lesbian friends.  I quickly learned that their experiences with the Church and Christians were almost always negative.  Many were kicked out of their churches, shunned by family members, and even spit upon by Christian roommates.  They didn’t have a positive view of Christians or the faith we professed.  From their experiences, I saw that many churches excluded rather than included LGBT people, had a closed-door policy rather than an open-door policy, and taught a type behavior modification rather than Gospel transformation.

These churches worked on the model of Behave, Believe, Belong.  Christians have told countless LGBT individuals that they must behave a certain way (be celibate or become heterosexual), believe a certain set of doctrines (this is right, that is wrong; this is sinful, that is holy), and then they are allowed to belong to the church community.  My fear is that this model might actually be more damaging than helpful.  My fear is that this model can distort our understanding of grace and our understanding of God.  My fear is that this model might force us to think that if we behave a certain way, believe a certain thing, then God will accept us.  Or worse, I fear that people will give up on God entirely because they are forced to behave rather than belong.

This is a very religious attitude.  Religion says we negotiate with God to try to get help in exchange for our good behavior.  We do what were told and, hopefully, God rewards us.  Because of religion in churches, we’re told you must be a certain way, act a certain way, behave a certain way, believe a certain doctrine, then belonging to our community can happen.

Instead, I think the Gospel presents a better model: Belong, Believe, Become. Continue reading Nathan Albert: “Belong, Believe, Become” →

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Nathan Albert: “What is the Loving Thing to Do?”

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Nathan Albert, The Marin Foundation

As a North Park Seminary student, I have spent the last ten months writing my thesis, which looks at the relationship between the Evangelical Covenant Church and homosexuality.  I have exegeted all the “clobber” passages, have read and reread the current documents the ECC has written about sexuality, and have read any book I can get my hands on the subject of faith and sexuality.  I also work for a non-profit that works to build bridges between the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) community and the Church.  I provide pastoral care for countless youth who are coming out, parents who have gay children, and churches that seek to dialogue about this controversial subject.  I live in the gay neighborhood of Chicago and long to show the beauty of Love and Grace to my countless gay friends who have given up on God.

For years, my views on homosexuality were conservative.  But now, after life has unfolded, after reading Scripture over and over, after consulting every commentary I can get my hands on, after years of studying and praying, and after befriending so many gays and lesbians, my views are changing. Continue reading Nathan Albert: “What is the Loving Thing to Do?” →